Monday, 17 January 2011

Top 10 conclusions of 2010

By Dan Morris

Icelandic ash cloud caused major chaos in 2010
1. Icelandic ash cloud

If you'd have asked me the significance of a volcanic ash cloud 12 months ago I'd have looked back at you, baffled and bemused. However, given the media coverage of the Icelandic ash cloud in early 2010 I can now confirm it has the potential to close a continents airspace, ruin holidays and leave many, stranded in places far a field. This was the story of the summer, as British airports closed through safety fears leaving travellers stranded and the skies empty.

2. The Pope

The Pope's visit was arguably the most eagerly anticipated arrival in recent years. Pope Benedict XVI came to Britain for the first tine in 28 years. Complete with his entourage of security and his Pope mobile, he toured the UK at the expense of the taxpayer. With his visit brought major security fears and the UK was handed the bill. Put simply, the general public were paying to protect the Pope from the general public, couldn't we have just come to some sort of an agreement? The total costs were in excess of £20 million, in a recession. Yes, try not to laugh.


If we've learnt one thing from last year, it’s that to beat the recession you're going to need the help of a fury friend. The Meerkat has proved commercial gold as 2010 saw the birth of Alasandr Orlov, a meerkat from Meerkovo. For us, comedy genius that has made adverts interesting again. For, marketing genius. Simples.

4. England's 2018 World Cup bid

Hopes and dreams of hosting the World Cup in 2018 were shattered as FIFA president Sepp Blatter revealed Russia were the successful applicants. In typical British fashion we all believed we would win, when in reality we came last. We only received two votes and one of them was our own, that doesn’t even count - it's like letting yourself turn up. We played all our aces, sending over the world’s worst boyband and still lost. The reasons leave a lot to be desired, but FIFA had to give it to Russia because they've never hosted a world cup. There’s a reason they've never held a world cup and it has something to do with security, temperature and five different time zones, obviously FIFA don’t see them as a major issues.

5. Chilean Miners

39 men, one mile below the earths surface for 69 days. That's the story for the Chilean Minors that spent nearly two months, twiddling their thumbs wondering if they'll ever see daylight ever again. I say 69 I mean 68, for the other minor he was wondering how he was going to explain his mistress to his, worried sick, wife. We'll never know if he wanted to come out last but as the viewing faithful, willed him to just concede defeat and reside in the tunnel he'd spent the last two months. He emerged from the capsule, used to save him from obscurity, sporting Victoria Beckham-esque shades. There's keeping out the sun, and there's trying to keep a low profile, of which I'm sure this is the latter. But if we've learnt one thing from this series of unfortunate events it's this; cheats NEVER prosper.

6. 15% VAT

Those days are now a mere distant memory, but for those of you interested enough you'll remember VAT was slashed from 17.5% to 15%. Oh what's that, you didn't even notice. Fair enough, unfortunately that attempt to curb inflation and increase spending has now had adverse effects as frantic shoppers spent there last few days of 2010 buying everything they could, as it's now taken the inevitable hike, to 20 per cent. Thanks then.

7. General Election

It was the first time I could vote, have my say in who I'd like to lead our country and make the decisions that matter. I can't say I got my own way, far from it. But I suppose I shouldn't feel too hard done-by, did anyone? When Gordon Brown called a general election for May 2010, who'd have thought that come June we'd have, in power, for the first time in history, a coalition government. The tabloids have nicknamed them the ConDems - it's as laughable as their policies, I know. Needless to say after adopting a nation in turmoil and deep into a recession, they've not been too popular. Cuts have been paramount and the phrase 'reduce the deficit' has been rife.

8. Rise in tuition fees: Student protests

Three years as a student and I never once threw a fire extinguisher off a ten story building. There's one thing protesting and there is another thing causing chaos and destruction because you feel it is your right to cheap University fees. Well, actually it's not. University education is an investment not a government funded holiday and if you think every middle middle class family pays for their children to swan off for three years i'm afraid you're strongly mistaken. Rant aside, last years rise in tuition fees and subsequent student protests did nothing to alter the stereotypical student persona and they no doubt achieved more bad than good. On a possitve note, there will be less students and that can only help in the jobs market.

9. Big Brother

Last year saw the end of an era for one reality television show - Big Brother. Last summer saw us entertained by a wooden chest of draws and some of the finest drongos the world over but after a decade on the box, the original reality TV show left our screens in emphatic style with a fantastic final series. Sad to see it go, yes. Glad, yes but unfortunately I’m sure its absence has only made way for even more drivel, littering our television screens.

10. Royal engagement

Not really an awful lot to say about this other than Prince William finally decided he'd like to wed long term girlfriend Kate Middleton. 2011 will see the first Royal wedding for over a decade, and it will bring with it, not only an attractive Royal but also an extra day off. The 29th April will be a national bank holiday - so everybody's happy. When's Harry planning on getting married?

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